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emotional eating

Your Holiday Eating Cheat Sheet

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Are you feeling some holiday pressure? Are you, along with lots of family and friends, jumping into entertaining and cooking mode?

Is food a good antidote to all of that stress (at least in the moment)?  What about the pressure – subtle and sometimes not so subtle – to eat everything that’s set out on the table by those close to you?

Then there’s the anger/guilt about eating way too much – and then repeating the whole process.

Consider These Ideas:

  • Don’t feel obliged to eat out of courtesy – especially if you don’t want the food or you’re full –because you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings.  Get over it – the calories are going into your mouth, not theirs.
  • Give yourself permission to NOT eat something just because it’s tradition. Whose tradition?
  • Only eat it if you want it. Eat what you want not what you think you should.
  • Say no to the friend or relative who is pushing the extra piece of pie. You’re the one stepping on the scale or zipping up your jeans the next day – not them.
  • Have some personal rules and commit to them.  An example might be:  I really want pecan pie for dessert so I’ll have only one biscuit without butter with my meal.
  • Make a deal (with yourself) that you can eat what you want during dinner. Put the food on your plate and enjoy every last morsel. Clean your plate if you want to. But – that’s it. No seconds and no double-decking the plate.
  • Make trades. Trade the biscuit and butter for wine with dinner. Limit the hors d’oeuvres. They really pack in calories. Make eating one or two your rule.
  • Choose your beverages wisely.  Alcohol adds calories (7 calories/gram). Alcohol with mixers adds even more calories. Plus, alcohol takes the edge off lots of things – including your ability to stick to your plan.
  • Drink water. It fills you up. Have a diet soda if you want. If you’re going to drink alcohol, try limiting the amount – think about alternating with water, seltzer, or unsweetened beverages.
  • Control your environment. Don’t hang around the buffet table or stand next to the platter of delicious whatevers. Why are you tempting yourself?
  • Talk to someone. It’s hard to shove food in your mouth when you’re talking.
  • Get rid of leftovers. Leftover stuffing has defeated the best-laid plans.
  • Don’t nibble during clean up (or preparation for that matter). Broken cookies, pieces of piecrust, and the last spoonsful of stuffing haven’t magically lost their calories.
  • Don’t starve yourself the day of a grand meal. If you do in an attempt to save up calories for a splurge, you’ll probably be so hungry by the time dinner is ready you’ll end up shoving food into your mouth faster than you can say turkey.
  • If you end up overeating, add in some longer walks and a couple of days of moderate eating afterward.

Do you want some more really helpful (and sometimes humorous) info about the holidays and holiday eating?  Check these out:

New on Amazon:  30 Ways to Eat Your Holiday Favorites and Still Get Into Your Jeans

Available from the iTunes store:  Eat Out Eat Well magazine

 

What Do Eating And Crossing The Street And Have in Common?

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Do You Look Both Ways?

Didn’t your parents teach you to look both ways before you cross the street?  The very act of looking and analyzing the situation before you step off the curb means that you are being mindful of your surroundings and aware of potential problems – like a car or bike speeding toward you.

What’s That Got To Do With Eating?

The same process – analyzing the environment and being mindful and aware of your situation — should be true with eating.

Before you pop food into your mouth do you check in with yourself and figure out if you’re really hungry?   Is your stomach growling and are you queasy and having trouble concentrating because you haven’t eaten in a long time and your blood sugar is low? Or is your desire to eat being triggered by the wafting smell of the freshly baked bread coming from the open door of a bakery or the sight of just out of the oven chocolate chip cookies?

Those are the kind of triggers that can create an irresistible urge to eat  – even if you’ve just had a good sized and satisfying meal.

What’s The Issue?

There are many situations — like the bakery trigger — when you eat in response to external cues (what you see, hear, smell, or even think) rather than mindfully checking in with your body and determining if you’re actually hungry. It’ sort of like looking both ways before you cross the street and then making your choice to cross or not to cross, isn’t it?

Check It Out And Then Make Your Decision

Let your body talk to you – and then listen to it.  Before food starts traveling the path to your mouth, stop and ask yourself if you’re really hungry or if you have head hunger  — the urge rather than the need to eat because your emotions and external cues are telling you that you should. Do you really need to eat or are your emotions sending you “feed me” messages?

Stop for a moment and look both ways before you decide to take the eating path — and then step off the curb into the street if you deem it safe and decide that’s what you want to do.

Are You Really Hungry Or Is It All In Your Head?

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Argument.  Stress. Overwhelm. Fatigue.

Cookies in the shopping cart.  Candy bar from the gas station.  Chips from the vending machine.  Raiding the refrigerator for leftovers followed by ice cream.

Sound familiar?

You could be stuffed to the gills but all you can think about is getting that cookie, candy bar, chips, or leftovers and chowing down – even though you’re not hungry and probably won’t enjoy what you’re about to eat.

There’s Real Hunger And There’s Head Hunger

Real hunger or physiological hunger is your body’s way of telling you that it’s time to eat food because your body needs nourishment.  It’s when you have that empty, rumbling feeling in your stomach, a headache, maybe some lightheadedness and difficulty concentrating.  It usually starts around four hours (plus or minus) after your last meal.

Head hunger or psychological hunger doesn’t really have physical symptoms and can happen at any time. It can be triggered by emotional situations, habits you associate with food or eating (like watching TV, working on the computer or driving in the car), by food cravings, or can be a form of procrastination.   Whatever triggers your head hunger can make you think you’re hungry when you’re really not.

Emotions:  Common Triggers For Eating

Emotions are common triggers for eating. Head hunger is a form of emotional eating that is usually in response to stress, sadness, loneliness, anger, fear, fatigue, overwhelm, or boredom.

Head hunger also serves as a distraction because the eating it provokes can be a way to distract yourself from difficult situations, projects, and encounters.

The feelings and situations that create head hunger are a part of your life.  Eating won’t make them go away.  Eating in response to head hunger often keeps you from figuring out what’s causing the feeling in the first place.

“I want chocolate” might really mean “I need comfort” or “I worked my tail off and I really need to be recognized for it.” Those trips back and forth to the fridge or the vending machine might be the ultimate form of procrastination – is there a project that needs to get done that you’re struggling with?

What To Do

Wouldn’t it be great if it was as simple as figuring out what’s causing your head hunger and dealing with it.  Actually, that’s the answer. Eating can’t really satisfy your emotional needs.  Left unmet, those needs will trigger your head hunger over and over.  So, you overeat, you mentally beat yourself up, you feel awful, and the whole process is triggered all over again.

To break the pattern, first stop beating yourself up when you do eat in response to head hunger (as opposed to eating because you’re starving and your stomach is growling like crazy).

Devise a plan to figure out what caused you to eat in the first place.  Try keeping a written record of what happened and how you felt before your head hunger took control. Looking back at a series of entries might give you a clue.  Once you get a handle on your triggers, come up with a plan to deal with them and make a “go-to” list of ways to reward, calm, comfort, and/or distract yourself without resorting to eating when you’re not actually physically hungry.

Allow yourself to figure out what “real” hunger actually feels like and the feelings that accompany true hunger.

Are You Using The Holidays As An Excuse To (Over)Eat?

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Gotta have the Christmas cookies, the candied yams, the stuffing with pecans, both pumpkin and pecan pies, the peanut brittle, eggnog, and whatever else your particular holiday, culture, and family traditions dictate.

Really???

Ask yourself why.  Are your groaning table and edible holiday delights really because of tradition – or, in part, an excuse to surround yourself with the food you love and want to eat?

There is nothing wrong with tradition and wanting to share your memories and love through food.

Are Holidays An Excuse To (Over)Eat?

The big question to ask yourself is:  am I really sharing/holding to tradition and memories of the season – or am I using the holidays as an excuse to make and eat a whole lot of food that I really would prefer not to eat – or eat in such quantity?

Most people who know me also know that I bake really good Christmas cookies – for a lot of events, not just Christmas.  I baked them for a party for my son’s July wedding (not a Christmas tree in sight) and as I brought them out there was a chorus of “Christmas cookies” from his friends who have eaten them many times before.  Didn’t matter that it was July.  The recipe was the same, they tasted the same, and they came from my kitchen.

What’s my point?  I love baking these cookies, and I love sharing them.  There are a whole host of emotions wrapped around these cookies.

I also know that I love eating them.  Have I ever used an occasion as an excuse to bake them – even though things would have been fine without the cookies?  You bet I have.

Why?  I love those cookies.  I love to eat them.  I love to eat the dough (I’m really not endorsing that – It’s a bad habit and the dough does have raw egg in it).

The bottom line is that I end up eating hundreds of calories – delicious, but not healthy ones – that I certainly don’t need.  And, even though I’m sharing what I consider to be “a little bit of love from my kitchen,” I still, very frequently, use the holiday or the event as an excuse.

Some Helpful Hints

I’m certainly not advocating giving up baking Christmas cookies or whatever your specialty or tradition is.  What I am suggesting is that you ask yourself the reason for doing so.  Recognize and be mindful of your reasons.

  • If you do make your specialty – plan for it.  Make it and then keep it out of sight (out of mind).  Eat it with everyone else – not in a constant stream of tasting and little snatches from the fridge or cupboard.
  • Store your amazing food out of sight and, hopefully, out of mind.  Far away, too.  Usually if we have to work to get food it may take some of the desire out of it.  So store the food in the basement or someplace out of the kitchen.
  • Leftovers?  Send them home with your family and friends.  I’ve fed lots of college dorms and offices with my leftovers.  Freeze them and store them in the back of the freezer where you can’t see them (although I can attest that frozen Christmas cookies are great – my sons once ate a whole container of them out of my downstairs freezer without my knowing about it.  Had to bake another batch before Christmas dinner.)

Traditions are important and food is nurturing.  Traditions, family, and holidays can also be stressful.  Cook away if that’s your pleasure. Just ask yourself if you are using holidays, traditions, guests, and family as excuses to (over)eat. 

Does Impulsive Mean Overweight And Neurotic Mean Yo-Yo?

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Are You Impulsive — Or Neurotic?

If you’re impulsive it seems that you are more likely to be overweight. If you’re highly neurotic and less conscientious, it’s more likely that you’ll see your weight go up and down.

At least that’s what was found in a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology — based on data accumulated over 50 years from close to 2,000 people. The researchers studied these generally healthy and highly educated people to attempt to determine how their personalities might affect their weight and body mass index.

Your Food Choices

So what does that mean for your food choices?

Think of it this way.  If you are an impulsive person and prone to giving into temptation — as many impulsive people are — standing in front of a delicious bakery window and peering in may not be the best idea for you.  It’s going to be darn hard not to succumb to temptation and turn around and walk away.  And, if you do walk in, what are the chances that you can just order coffee without getting that delicious cinnamon-pecan sticky bun to go along with it?

So maybe do yourself a favor and plan your route so you don’t pass the bakery.  By doing so you cut down on the opportunities for those impulsive food purchases that you might regret later.

Risky, Antagonistic, Cynical, Competitive, Aggressive

And by the way, according to the study people who are risk takers — or who are antagonistic, cynical, competitive, and aggressive — also gained more weight.

And If You’re Conscientious . . .

Lucky you if you’re conscientious because you were found (in the study) to typically be thinner.